the final decision

" if you think you can make our own decision , show them you can "

" i don't know , both are my favourite countries you know "

well , now i regret that i don't even write a single note when the lecturer gave a talk about the 3 countries which gmi will be sending us to .  they say that it's no use to cry over a spill milk .

" you don't need to be afraid if you think you are right "

" stand up for your own right "

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.
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" dad , i need to talk to you "

" yeah ? about what ? "

" well , it's about the country that i should choose as my next move for degree "

" ah , yes . i really want you to further your study to germany . they're the best you know "

" yeah papa . i know . but my friends said that there are a lot who can't make it to the end . they're stuck in the 3rd year . how am i suppose to pay all the fees if i ended up like them ? "

" who can't make it ? "

" the malaysians . not just malaysians , the germany students can't make it as well . the exams must be so hard that even the german students can't do it . well , it's not about the language thought . "

" hmmm , but your german language , you can do it right ? "

" yeah . i guess "

" if you don't want to go to germany , then i would have to suggest you to go to... "

" uk papa ? uk is the best too "



" if you can't make it to germany , you'll be further your degree in um "

" WHAT ? ! "



i spent my days thinking about my papa's decision . why he wouldn't let me further my study in uk ? why must um ? um is a very tough , for very very brilliant students .

" um is the best universities in malaysia that provide engineering course "

come to think of it , my dad was once a student there .

it's not that i don't want to go to germany . i really do . especially in further my study in overseas . but among the countries , uk and germany are my favourite . when i knew that after 3 years of diploma in gmi , then mara will send us to one of the 3 countries that gmi suggested , i was like  . all i ever think of is going to GERMANY .

why ?

because i think that not all the people can go to germany , as germany has their own languages , cultures and other stuffs that makes them different than other countries . i learn german language ever since i got the offer of entering gmi .

having to further my degree in germany will have to cost me 4 years staying there . without going back to malaysia if there's holiday i guess . mostly students will choose australia or uk because the engineering there just need 2 years to study degree .

" the education in uk and australia needs to pay . that's why i don't recommend you to go to uk "

well , sometimes we think that it's the worst but it is actually the best for us . parents' decisions are the best . i must agree with that .

" you've wasted 3 years in gmi , and you'll be entering um ? "

" no mama . i wont . i will go to germany "

did i just say that ?

shortly , i just wanna say ,
that even though i think that germany isn't the best choice for me , because of the stories that i've been heard , and i know how far i can go ,
but that doesn't mean that i can't go far enough . those are the challenges that only the best among the best can handle them .
to me , those who can study overseas are the best among everyone , but to be the best among the best is to take the challenges and learn from mistakes .

parents choice is always the best . they know what is the best for us , for them , for the future . cause some of them just don't get the opportunity like we do .

" kalau kau graduate dr german tu memang aku tabik kau la miza "

" x kesah pn apa orang nak kata , yang penting nk g german gak "

if you really want it , you get it .

the request 2 : my best friend

" hahaha , zaki minat kau ? "

* apa si gopeng nih dok merapu *

" xde lh . dy asyik suruh aku promote dy . so aku promote la . knpe plak dy nk minat aku ? "

" bukan2 , there's something kt watsapp . ap bnda tah . islamic studies jap "

* haha , x caya aku dy nih ! *

we are just friends la , lala -.-'

if my last post i wrote about , typed actually , about promoting my friend , haha , well in this one i'm gonna introduce my best friend , lala , or known as L .

" me ? a stalker ? not anymore "

we'll see about that .
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" awak , boleh tlg tahan jap ? "

* tahan ? *

" ok "

i know her ever since the first day of class when we were in sem 1 . everyone looked kinda arrogant to me , except this girl . she is nor dalila sofia bt ahmad satar , and people used to call her lala . we became closer since then , and by chance we are from mrsm , i'm from betong , sarawak , and she's from kuala kubu baru .

" kkb ? apa kkb ? "

" kuala kubu baru la "

" ow , mne tau . it could be anything else besides kuala kubu baru "

" kota kubu baru , haha "

yeah , i once said that kkb was kota kubu baru , just because i forgot about the name 

bukan nk puji melebih2 la , but she's a good friend . she's just like my best friend when i was in mrsm .

so after we become closer , every assignment that the lecturers gave us , we'll be in same group . except for certain subjects , such as english and metrology . other than that ,

" you can choose your own group members . one group must be blablabla "

" miza , lala , join ktorg "

" lala , sini lala , ajak miza skali "

yup , we always stick together .


she's really good in math . she loves math very much . and every test she scored the highest among us . she became our mentor instead .

" lala , blh ajar math ? "

" blh je . bla nk ? "

" tgk la . nnti inform . ajak miza skali "



" lala , betul ke ni aku buat ? "

" aah , betul lh . aku pn dpt jwpn sme gak "

" miza , ajar aku ni blh x ? "

" oh , tu aku xdpt jwb la , aku still kira lg . cuba tny lala "

lala lala lala lala lala lala lala lala lala lala lala lala lala lala lala lala lala lala lala lala

lala here . lala there .

sometimes i feel pity of her , as people always call out her name , especially me , even a small thing i asked her to do for me . for example , open a bottle that is tightly capped . sometimes i feel like , oh god , i always susahkn dy . but she said , neh , aku x kesah la . and so , i keep bullying her since then . hehe


she's a really fast learner . she can remember things even though you just showed her in 5 seconds .

" eh miza , jangan mrh . aku gurau je "

" eh xde lh , aku x mrh pn "

" aku dh tau dh kau akn ckp cmtu . haha "

pdhal aku just keep silent . yeah , she asked the question and she answered it too . she knew what i'm gonna say . jimat air liur gak la kn ?

one of the things that we always do the same , is that we love to eat ice .


yup , just give us a plastic of teh ais , not the teh that we're looking for , it's the ice .

" ayah aku ckp , xbek mkn ais ni lebih2 lg kalau kita nga berpeluh . sbb ad sakit tu tah . aku pn x ingat "

" oh yeke ? ok la lepas ni xyah mkn ais lg lh "

" yela . aku pn xnk mkn ais lagi "

* later at cafe . . .

" eh lala , ais kau banyak la . asal aku pny ckit je ek ? "

" kau nk ke ? amik ar "

perangai masih x berubah . tau cakap je  we tried to change ourselves once , by writing down our schedule and follow it 100% . do you think we made it ?

" lala , esk kita nk buat ap nih ? "

" ok . esk , pagi kita beli barang , lepas tu kita g gmi amik board tu . mlm kita buat nota agama "

" rajin kau nk buat nota "

" kene doe . aku xnk nnti kita kne revise balik dr mula . bla buat nota at least kita dh belajar ckit "

* motivasi diri *

" ok . hri selasa ? "

" hri selasa bi . hri rabu kita ikut ayah aku buat program , malam tu  study german "

we did follow the schedule actually . but not entirely . hehe

" ok . hri ni kita dh beli barang . so kita buat nota agama skrg . bgs2 . kita dh ad kemajuan lala "

* bgs gak tinggal kt umh lala nih . aku jd productive *

 productive la sangat !

somehow we looked like as if we're trying to   from the schedule . day by day it we should study at 9pm , but instead we made it even late than we planned .

" lala , jom stdy . ke kau nk rehat dulu ? "

" blh gak . aku on9 jap . hehe "

* after an hour

" lala , stdy jom . lala ? "



" lala , bangun . stdy jom "

" ok "

* buat nota agama

" la , aku nk tdo jap . bangun kn aku 5 minit lg tau "

 * 5 minutes later

" miza , bangun . stdy miza "

" kejap la . 5 minit lg "

 * 5 minutes later

" miza . stdy miza "

" ish kau nih , aku x kacau kau tdo pn . biar la aku tdo kejap . kau tdo aku bg extra time lg tau "

lepas tu , ble bangun tdo esk tu tau menyesal plak .

best friends sometimes fight each other . we had a fight once . but the last day before the final paper , i went to her room and explained everything . hear everything . that made me learn something . that teamwork and trust between best friends are very important . somehow i managed to get some help , but it turned out to be i have those who dislike in what i'm doing . i always get help in everything that i do .

" come to think of it , it's your luck . why should we be angry with you ? "

maybe i did make a mistake . and for some reason she too felt being left out . one thing that made me respect her is that during our fight , people talked about me a lot . and she somehow being hypnotized by some words that made her feel being left out . instead of saying mean words too , she stood up for me . even though the conversations were not well between us . 

if you need some news to be spread very fast , especially gossips , just tell her . she spreads them very very fast . but sometimes she makes up stories that made the gossips very hot ! boleh tahan......

" miza , tadi kn ida nak amik handphone kt warta . tp kedai tu x siap buat lg "

" miza , tadi kn aku ngn lala g warta "

" lepas tu handphone kau x siap lg kn ? so kau xleh nk amik handphone "

" mcm mna kau tau nih ? ! "

" lala dh bgtau aku "

" aku bgtau dy sblm kau dtg lg "

* roomate lala masok bilik

" eh tadi kn , ida g warta ... "

" eh , perlu ke kau bgtau semua org ? "


between me and lala , we have no secrets . well , i can say that i can tell her anything , she can tell me anything either .

and because of that too , she told me more about her past , especially her moments in mrsm .

" pernah kn mse lelaki masok asrama perempuan kn , aku blablabla "

" la yeke ? lepas tu ? "

* a few days later

" mse lelaki masok asrama perempuan kt mrsm aku dlu , aku blablabla "

* a few months later

" mse lelaki masok asrama perempuan kt mrsm aku dlu , ak blablabla "

" ye , lepas tu kau blablabla "

" hehe , kesian kau kne dgr cte aku berkali2 "

" ye , cte ap je yg aku xtau psl kau ni lala "

yup , the stories keep repeating over and over again .  and because of that , i'm too addicted to that disease now .

she's sometimes forgetful as well .

" kt dpn kls aku ad 2 tangga tau . blablabla . phm x cte aku ? "

" ye lala , aku tau . aku penah g mrsm kau "

" yeke ? aah la "

so everytime she tells me about her mrsm , i can automaticly imagine that more lively . she showed me around when we went to mrsm kkb for jelajah mrsm . so that's it . there's a lot to say actually . thank god we still best friends even though there's a lot that we've been through . she always cheer me up , always give me strength when i'm down , and always there for me . yup , she is .

* arguing about the pictures we posted in islamic studies watsapp

" aku x mcm kau . kau hotsetap . aku segan la blablabla "

" aku bkn ny hotsetap . aku biasa je la . hotsetap blablabla "

" yela . xyah hotsetap sgt . jd normal people sudah . penat dgr skrg ni org sekeliling nk famous . haha with dat u have to write something about me "

awwwww , isn't she's cute saying that ?

haha

the request

" awk buat cte yg baek2 tau psl sy . mne tau kot2 dpt crik jodoh ke ble awk promote sy dlm blog awk "

* ap benda la mamat nih merepek *

" haha , tgk la kalau sy rajin "

" ok , nnti da siap bgtau sy tau . nnti sy CHECK IT OUT "

* haha , cakap omputeh kawan kelate aku nih *

ok , i'm gonna post something that i haven't done before . as requested , my friend , ahmad zaki asked me to " promote " him in my blog . i ain't good in promoting stuffs la . at first i said   but then , i said , hey , why don't give it a try . kesian tengok dy nnti . haha

well , i actually don't know him quite well as i don't actually talk to people i don't recognized . given a name of ahmad zaki ( ye ke ? ) he's actually my classmate ! but i don't know him . he's really famous in class , we're in the same class in islamic studies , where pdm combined class with tdt . so , even though people always say out his name , i asked my friend who's sitting next to me ,

" who the heck is zaki ? " 

" you don't know ? he's right over there "

" yup , and i still don't know him "

yeah , well , that's actually my real problem , i'm hardly remember people faces .

all i know about him , is that he's a kelantan guy , but lives in kedah . konon ny mengaku orang kedah ek zaki? 

" awk ni dah mamam blom ? "

" dah , awk ? "

" sy blom . ngah lapor nih . awk ad mknn x ? pos la kat sy . haha "

* aii , boleh dapat cram perut nih sebab asyik gelak je * 

he's kinda funny , and caring too . haha !  so sape2 yg berkenan ngn dy nih jgn isau la , dy xkn crik yg lain . kot  ? 

but there's just one problem .

" gelak tu bgs . blh release tension "

" ap2 je la awk "

" eh wak , kakak sy ad kt srwk tu . kalau ad jmp dy , kirim slm tau "

* ap benda la dy nih merapu lg *

" mcm la sy penah jmp dy "

" ow , sy ingt awk knl . lg satu , klw awk jmp stacy n marsha , tlg snap gmbr dy eek . sy minat kt dy la "

hahahaha ap ke bengong ny mamat nih .

tu la problem dy , dy cepat tukar topik . ye ek ? easily distracted la katakan . ni kalau gadoh ngn dy mmg sakit ati la sbb topik salu tukar . haha. but actually , he can cheer you up . i meant those who attracted to him . haha

one thing for sure ,

" assalamualaikum awk . bgon myg sbuh . 6.30 dh nie . lewat dh . bgon3 "

amboiii , cewiiiittttttttt ny dy  HAHA

yeah , i think he can be your imam girls . beruntung sape dapat mamat ni haaa . 

cukup package la kn ?

he's smart , caring , gentlemen , funny , and most important , he can be leader in his family someday .

did i mentioned he's smart ? kalau x silap , carry marks dy utk islamic studies paling tinggi kt kelas kot . kelas dy la . hehe

well zaki . this one's for u . haha

actually i keep laughing over and over again when typing about him . i do not know him quite well you know . but he keep asking me to put his name in my blog , and last night , asked me to promote him .

whatever la . kesian gak tgk dy . ap la slh berbakti ckit . haha

" eh , is this your boyfriend ? "

" what ? no . he's just a friend . my classmate actually . ex classmate . he asked me to promote him . but i dont know how "

" haha . don't you have a boyfriend ? "

" why ? "

" you're pretty . you must be very famous "

" haha . famous la sgt . because i'm pretty i need someone who's accept me as who i really am , not because i'm pretty "

" sounds like an expensive perfume "

* glad to be one *



" tell me , i'm your friend . who do you like ? is there someone who wins your heart ? "

" that's top secret " 

the dinner

" u have got to be kidding me . why haven't you dressed up yet ?! "

" i am dressing up "

" you didn't do anything at home . you should have ready earlier . the dinner starts at 7pm "

" the dinner won't be starting at exactly 7pm , mama . janji melayu la , plus minus 5 minutes ke "

" eh , YB datang nnti so the event should be started as in the schedule . now we are 15 minutes late . blablablablablablablablablabla "

i've got a dinner tonight , where my sister and i will be receiving money ( x tapis2 lagi cakap ) hehe for our pmr and spm . as usual , i took my bath very long , playing with the shower and bubbles , and there you go , my mom kept blabering that i haven't dressed up after she went home from work . it was 6.45pm when i finished taking , i meant playing with water . so my mom was like,

" u have got to be kidding me . why haven't you dressed up yet ?! "

" i am dressing up "

" you didn't do anything at home . you should have ready earlier . the dinner starts at 7pm "

and there you go . my story is repeated all over again . those who are close to me will know that i like to repeat the story all over again . well , the disease started when my bestfriend , L , keeps telling me about her life . she has such an awesome life , that i can say ,

" what is the story that i haven't heard yet ? "

yeah , that kind of thingy . and since then , the disease spread into me , and now i hardly cure the disease . 

back to my story , when my mom blabering , i was like 

so we went to dewan suarah at 7.15pm and the YBs' were in front of the main door . so i guess we're in the red carpet list .

so , the events were , singing the national songs , koir , boring speeches , giving the money event ( x blh blah ayat ) , some singing and dancing , the lucky prize and then event ended .

i walked up to the stage twice , because taking the certificates of pmr and spm exam . i was wearing a blouse , the pink scarf - again , my pink jeans and my beloved boots . hehe when i look at the ribbons on my certificates , one of the ribbons were pink ! PINK ! AGAIN ?!

the event were supposed to end at 11pm , but my family and i  went out early because my siblings felt asleep . we went to the main door , and take some photos there , just nak amik " Anugerah Pencapaian Sijil dan Insentif " well , something like that la the sentences . then , while we were photoshooting ( tu baru perasan macam artis )

then suddenly , a guy came to us . . .
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.
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" hey , excuse me "

*starring like he's a criminal*

" will u be my model for tonight ? i want to snap some photos of you guys " 

and i was like 

 OMG ! this is the chance that i've been waiting for ! so we accept the offer and we gave our best shot  

while we were photo shooting , there were some people looking at us , asking our signatures . awwwwww , feels like we're really models 

haha , no lh , actually the guy was a photographer . when he saw we took ourselves some pictures at the main door , he offered us his help . he used his camera and we took some pictures , just like photo shooting in the , ermm , what do you call that , ala tempat shooting tu..lupa la nama..i get old already 

oh ya , while waiting for my name to be called out to receive my prize , i met my old friends , Lia Atika , Aaron Wong and Matson Luna . the two of them still remember me , but suprisingly Matson said he didn't know me . sedangkan aku nih sama kelas ngn dy mse sklh rendah , then sklh menengah kls pn sebelah2 , then dy g mrsm kuching , i went to mrsm betong , and yet , dy kata dy x kenal aku ? ! *rsa nk mgamuk*  

" hi matson "

" hi , kau sape "

so i was like 

" lia , dy ckp dy x knl aku "

" tu la , dy pn x knl aku "

tp biasa la tu , i sometimes don't remember my old friends too . cuma tonight i got to feel what is it like to be forgotten 

we reached home at exactly 11pm , i changed my clothes , took my laptop upstairs and started blogging . tipu la if i said i didn't look at my handphone , hoping for someone to text me . it's been a couple of days , and maybe i should started to  .

" you shouldn't think of someone that doesn't think of you . i love u cousin , and i don't want you to get hurt "